In bed this morning,got a knock on the door.

It was one of those people dropping Ikea booklets off or something.

Opened the door and no one there so went outside to pick it up,with only a towel on.


Course the self locking door closed behind me!


Luckilyl I managed to steal / borrow some of my female neighbours clothes for a while off her washing line.

Locksmith arrived around an hour and a half later.

Not sure of the damage yet but last time i locked myself out it was on a Public Holiday,got quoted around two hundred!

It was just a ploy to get into her pants!!!!!!

I don't get on with her.

I left while back a 10 litre Pureau water container in her bin.

Woke up the next day and it was outside my front door.

Got the message.


Returned her pants on the sly,though must confess her pants did feel warm and cosy on me

For a second there I thought you'd been locked out of seabreeze

BTW where was your phone or did you telepathically call the locksmith?

petermac33 said..
I don't get on with her.

I left while back a 10 litre Pureau water container in her bin.

Woke up the next day and it was outside my front door.

Got the message.


Returned her pants on the sly,though must confess her pants did feel warm and cosy on me

Can't say I would like having neighbours that put their junk in my bin, but I think that's better than having neighbours that put their junk in my pants.

Did the events happen strictly in the order you wrote? Or did you wear the pants first and build the rest around that

Lost my spare set of car keys last week.

Was planning today to get the car key cut from a specialist who has a way of encoding the key.

Got quoted 120 and that's cheap from what I've heard.

Pics or it didn't happen.

Harrow said..

petermac33 said..
Lost my spare set of car keys last week.

Was planning today to get the car key cut from a specialist who has a way of encoding the key.

Got quoted 120 and that's cheap from what I've heard.

The procedures to encode the key are often quite kooky. They are typically something like this....

1. Put key in ignition.
2. Press brake pedal.
3. Open and shut drivers door 3 times.
4. Press brake pedal again.
5. Open and and shut drivers door 3 times again.
6. Take key out of ignition.

Different for each model of car. Google, and save yourself a heap of money.

You are telling this to a guy that has been locked out twice, and lost his car keys.

I think paying a locksmith might be the best bet


As for coding keys, it will all depend on the car. Some are really easy, and others require a computer to do it.

True story, pre digital days, so no pics kiddies

At a previous abode, for a time I was getting totally hammered by every doorknocker out there

SalvOs, good sams, the save everything crowds and every religious persuasion you could imagine

One day after a hard days yakka, I was wandering in my towel from the bathroom to my bedroom ( of which faced the verandah ) and through the lacey curtains gf had put up, I spotted a couple of guys in black pants and white shirts approaching the front door

I thought, aarghh FFS, JW's, that's it, Iv'e fkn had it with this sh!t

Spur of the moment, dropped me towel, answered the door stark naked

Said, G'day fellas how ya goin, wanna come in for a cuppa ?

The reply went something like this

Oh, Good afternoon Sir, we're from D---y real estate and we're doing free market appraisals in your area...

FormulaNova said..

Buster fin said..

FormulaNova said..


Odds are that not even one woman does that.

OOh ooh, how much are you looking to lose today?

I will wager $5. Please supply the address.

You'll be soooooorrrrryyyyyyy.

Buster fin said..

FormulaNova said..

Buster fin said..

FormulaNova said..


Odds are that not even one woman does that.

OOh ooh, how much are you looking to lose today?

I will wager $5. Please supply the address.

You'll be soooooorrrrryyyyyyy.

Huh hem, I would just like to make it clear that a conspiracy theorist in women's pants does not make a woman