How do you get kitesurfing banned ?

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waveslave
waveslave
WA
4263 posts
WA, 4263 posts
14 May 2012 8:29pm
Just wondering what one would have to do to get kitesurfing banned at a particular beach.
What are the procedures involved ?
waveslave
waveslave
WA
4263 posts
WA, 4263 posts
14 May 2012 8:36pm
Hmmm....
No one knows.
I thought so.
lol.
greenleader
greenleader
QLD
5283 posts
QLD, 5283 posts
14 May 2012 11:00pm
what is the difference between evel knievel and femfresh?
greenleader
greenleader
QLD
5283 posts
QLD, 5283 posts
14 May 2012 11:01pm
evel knievel is for kinky stunts!
PercyPenguin
PercyPenguin
9 posts
9 posts
14 May 2012 9:02pm
You know Slave - quite a few saw YOU the day you bum-dragged self-launched on your precious local beach, showing off to a couple of gorgeous teuro chicks and got smashed... Who else might YOU have taken out?
PercyPenguin
PercyPenguin
9 posts
9 posts
14 May 2012 9:13pm
What; don't remember Slave? That's how you do it...
PercyPenguin
PercyPenguin
9 posts
9 posts
14 May 2012 10:09pm
Slave???
PercyPenguin
PercyPenguin
9 posts
9 posts
14 May 2012 10:31pm
Slave...?

lol indeed...
RPM
RPM
WA
1549 posts
RPM RPM
WA, 1549 posts
15 May 2012 3:18pm
PercyPenguin said...

You know Slave - quite a few saw YOU the day you bum-dragged self-launched on your precious local beach, showing off to a couple of gorgeous teuro chicks and got smashed... Who else might YOU have taken out?


LoL he cant self launch properly!! The 'pioneer of kitesurfing' himself..

Oh man!

Can we pls have pics of waveslave in action??? Was he 'lit'?
Surfer62
Surfer62
1357 posts
1357 posts
15 May 2012 3:39pm
He cant hear you percy, his avatar has got a penis in each ear
lotofwind
lotofwind
NSW
6451 posts
NSW, 6451 posts
15 May 2012 8:11pm
He should have used the waveslave launch pad (patent pending).
Did that invention ever take off.? pardon the pun
waveslave
waveslave
WA
4263 posts
WA, 4263 posts
15 May 2012 8:20pm
RPM said...

PercyPenguin said...

You know Slave - quite a few saw YOU the day you bum-dragged self-launched on your precious local beach, showing off to a couple of gorgeous teuro chicks and got smashed... Who else might YOU have taken out?


LoL he cant self launch properly!! The 'pioneer of kitesurfing' himself..

Oh man!

Can we pls have pics of waveslave in action??? Was he 'lit'?



Do you actually believe this Penguin poo, RPM ?
Gorgeous tourist chicks ....I wish.
I live in a freakin backwater, dude.
No cool people or tourists for miles.
lol.


waveslave
waveslave
WA
4263 posts
WA, 4263 posts
15 May 2012 8:41pm
lotofwind said...

He should have used the waveslave launch pad (patent pending).
Did that invention ever take off.? pardon the pun


I use the LaunchPad (patent-pending) every session.
It's particularly handy on those lonely winter days when it's 30 knots.

jamdfingr
jamdfingr
QLD
663 posts
QLD, 663 posts
16 May 2012 2:22pm
Surfer62 said...

He cant hear you percy, his avatar has got a penis in each ear


Thanks mate, you made me shoot soup out my nose....

bjw
bjw
QLD
3691 posts
bjw bjw
QLD, 3691 posts
16 May 2012 4:43pm
I'm not sure but I've been trying for years.
pattiecannon
pattiecannon
QLD
593 posts
QLD, 593 posts
17 May 2012 9:55pm
I reckon the same move but with instead of backpackers invite you city councillors daughters and this time don't miss 'em. That ought to set the ball in the weird direction your looking for.
Mark _australia
Mark _australia
WA
23702 posts
WA, 23702 posts
17 May 2012 10:31pm
waveslave said...

Just wondering what one would have to do to get kitesurfing banned at a particular beach.


Assuming you are serious (probably not), I will be serious

Step 1.
Start kiting at a certain beach. It gets really popular so lots of people go there

Step 2.
Kooks just learning go outside their ability and should not be there, and that is mostly dealt with OK by the experienced guys, but some other experienced guys start to be c0cks and turn close to swimmers, cut off and drop in on windsurfers or surfers and so on.

Step 3
Establish a kiting area and a windsurfing area. Make the kiting area WAKSA or AKSA members only. (Thinking a certain Perth beach here)
Have about 20% of kiters ignore it totally, and when spoke to politely, have them abuse the sh!t out of the kiters and windsurfers who are trying to politely correct them

Step 4
When said kiters and windsurfers raise it for polite discussion online, bag the fk out of them. Kiters get bagged totally, but windsurfers get added vitriol (as they must be haters). ... But add winks when being a rude arrogant **** so it looks like you don't really mean it
The odd person will say "lolz I boost over all them polies and swimmers lol hee hee look at me"
Continue as above for, hmmm, say 2 - 3 years

Step 5
When bans are really close, have a sook.
When responsible kiters say "told u so", continue to bag them out
Then complain that the councils looking at banning kiting must read seabreeze, but don't regret your past dumb posts

Step 6
While all the above occurs, be rude and take the p!ss out of noobs who ask questions online, so they don't feel welcome and are less inclined to ask. When they stuff up, mock them publicly.... but don't consider for a second that if the forum was more inclusive you could have prevented their very public **** up.

Step 7
Post threads like this which are unhelpful and borderline p!sstake on a serious issue that affects all watersports participants

(PS talking in general terms, not accusing waveslave of any of the above actions bar number 7)
theDoctor
theDoctor
NSW
5786 posts
NSW, 5786 posts
18 May 2012 1:00am


kite in the nude...?
pattiecannon
pattiecannon
QLD
593 posts
QLD, 593 posts
18 May 2012 8:44am
Hahaha Nude kiting should work Doc! Try borrowing some beachgoers towel after your sesh to make sure.

Hey as a noob I've never heard of Slaves pat pending Launch Pad.
Is this thing real? Is it good for landing?(My big difficulty at the mo)

Slave, any demo models avail on the cheap?

jamdfingr
jamdfingr
QLD
663 posts
QLD, 663 posts
18 May 2012 4:27pm
Don't know how Slaves "Launch Pad" works but here is what I do...

Step one... go kiting with a mate...

Step 2... Get mate to help launch kite...

Step 3... Go Kiting....

Never had an accident with a launch when using this technique...


If you do go somewhere and have to launch on your own... (not reccomended) or if, you are the good friend who launches the other dude first...

I keep a large sleeping bag cover in my kite bag. It has a rope and carabinha attached to it...

If needed, I fill it with sand, attach it to my chicken loop, pull in the depower strap and then walk my kite out to the edge of the window in the launch position.

It should just sit there boucning and ready to go....

Then walk/jog back to your bar, attatch safety line first, and then attach chicken loop.

Cheap method but make sure you have plenty of weight in the bag as it is surprising how much the kite will pull.
Paul1
Paul1
QLD
1011 posts
QLD, 1011 posts
18 May 2012 5:34pm
If you can't self launch safely you are a danger to society, has to be the easiest thing you can do, unless you are a complete kook.....
waveslave
waveslave
WA
4263 posts
WA, 4263 posts
18 May 2012 4:00pm
pattiecannon said...


Hey as a noob I've never heard of Slaves pat pending Launch Pad.

Is this thing real? Is it good for landing?(My big difficulty at the mo)



Yes, it is real.
No, it's not for landing. ^^^

hamburglar
hamburglar
ACT
2174 posts
ACT, 2174 posts
19 May 2012 1:37pm
Paul1 said...

If you can't self launch safely you are a danger to society, has to be the easiest thing you can do, unless you are a complete kook.....


+1 and don't forget self landing, same same but different
pattiecannon
pattiecannon
QLD
593 posts
QLD, 593 posts
19 May 2012 7:37pm
good luck with the patent slave.

did you find any of our suggestions helpful mate?
TurtleHunter
TurtleHunter
WA
1675 posts
WA, 1675 posts
20 May 2012 12:49pm
hamburglar said...

same same but different



lol just got from Thailand and heard this a lot. It was always the different part that scared me
puppetonastring
puppetonastring
WA
3619 posts
WA, 3619 posts
20 May 2012 1:19pm
Too many lol replies here to quote quote quote. U know who u are. Pack of funny buggars. LMFAO repeatedly. One thing about Slave - he knows how to enthuse comedy.

I too missed the launching pad
Plooys explain ?
Fix My Kite have one - it's copiable by hooking a bit if rope to your tow bar
Save urself $20.
puppetonastring
puppetonastring
WA
3619 posts
WA, 3619 posts
20 May 2012 1:27pm
I invented the 'launch-m-aid' way back in the early days.
It was a blow up doll with remote control hands. One press of the button and she'd let go of the kite.
Worked like a dream doll till Poor Rellie ran off with her.
Last I heard she had been kitted out with a whole lot of retro fit rude bits to be passed around at parties
Danmurphys
Danmurphys
WA
231 posts
WA, 231 posts
20 May 2012 1:42pm
theDoctor said...


kite in the nude...?


Looks like someone in NSW liked to kite in the nude hey Doc..


anoldman
anoldman
75 posts
75 posts
20 May 2012 2:18pm
They got it banned at Wellington Point in Brisbane by an over lit'er being dragged through the beach side cafe. Main issue was not paying.
Mark _australia
Mark _australia
WA
23702 posts
WA, 23702 posts
20 May 2012 4:42pm
anoldman said...

They got it banned at Wellington Point in Brisbane by an over lit'er being dragged through the beach side cafe. Main issue was not paying.


Oh geez don't say "lit" in a waveslave thread, he will start all over again

waveslave
waveslave
WA
4263 posts
WA, 4263 posts
20 May 2012 8:03pm
Paul1 said...

If you can't self launch safely you are a danger to society, has to be the easiest thing you can do, unless you are a complete kook.....


Self-launching ...
Sometimes you kook out.
Sometimes it's lethal.
Most times it's easy.

Please don't tempt fate with comments like the above. ^^^
When you dare the universe, the universe often takes up the challenge.
Believing you're invincible with a kite and the elements is asking the cosmos for misery.
Get an assist with your next kite sesh.
I'm very superstitious, you know.


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