"Dude, I finally sold off that poleboard sail. Now I need it shipped -- but I'm hell confused."

"Wow Man, where's the buyer at?"

"Dude, he's overseas -- and I think I should get the money upfront."

"How does the buyer feel about that, Man?"

"Dude, the buyer wants a C.O.D. -- Cash on delivery, W.T.F. -- What the Fk."

"Torn hey Man?"

"No Dude, the sail is totally perfect. Like no rips or anything."

"No Man, I'm talking about your mixed feelings -- your concerns about trust issues."

"Yeah right Dude, I don't trust the douchebag."

"So Man, how about doing a 50/50 deal? 50% down, 50% on delivery."

"No way Dude. When he checks out how blown-out the sail is, he'll reneg on the rest of the payment."

"Right Man."

^^^With that said, I think it is still better than his usual attempts. I actually laughed a tiny bit at the punch line...

Still, keeping with tradition, when Dude and Man are here... I post this: