Hi all
It’s been mentioned kiters are very unpredictable so to help, here’s the idiots guide to understanding kiting.
1. Kiter in water, feet in straps, kite in air. Any second he will dive his kite 12o'clock to 3 (or 9) to waterstart and take off.
2. Kiter in water looking lost means he’s lost his board. Our boards are very thin and even small chop can obscure it when your head is at water level. Even worse if it's upside down. If you see his board point it out (you're much higher up) or if you're really nice take it back to him. He'll be most grateful and totally amazed a "pole dancer" helped him out.
3. Kiter in water body dragging - He's trying to get back to his board (or still looking for it)
4. Kiter scanning around him – he’s either checkout the scenery or seeing if it’s all clear for him to transition (gybe/tack) or jump.
5. Kiter yanks his kite from 3o'clock to 12, he's started his jump. He should have checked no one is down wind but just in case keep an eye on this trajectory. Sometimes a gust can take him higher/longer than anticipated.
6. Kite spinning uncontrollably - a line has caught on something (eg the kite bar), stay well away. He’s got enough problems without people abusing him.
7. Kiter kiting with only one hand – no he’s not being a tosser and showing off. It can actually be easier this way.
8. Kiter smashes his kite in your path – trust me on this one, he hasn’t done it on purpose to piss you off. Kites are a LOT more fragile than sails so he’s probably more pissed with himself than you are with him anyway. He’s probably a learner so take a note of the colour of his kite and just give him a wide berth next time.
9. Kiter walking up the beach with kite in hand - either the Walk of Shame (hasn't learnt to edge/kite to windward yet) or something failed - either way point and laugh. Just kidding - every kiter goes through this, it's a rite of passage.
10. Kiter getting dragged up the beach – grab either the leading edge of the kite (the fat bladder bit) or grab the person. Either could save his life.
If you want any strange kiter behaviour explained, I'll try my best.
Ex-windsurfer who has gone over to the dark side.....

FF