Coastal weather guru Dr Gulbull has stated that the unusual currents which brought the recent Irukandji jelly fish to Frazer Island is evidence that conflicting pressure off the Gold Coast up until Easter combined with late summer heat will twist southerly winds to the southeast creating ideal conditions for local windsurfers.

As the new artificial reef opened yesterday at Kingscliff the crowds on Gold Coast points have all but disappeared, and should remain that way at least until the novelty wears off or they start charging for entry. Entry to the enclosed park will be free during the opening period up until the end of Easter.The perfect wave formed by the new design will provide a variety of wave types. Beginner, intermediate/advanced, simulated coral barrels for the experts, and caged no rules full contact section for those who enjoy the hassle. Sumo suits will be provided for beginner cage surfers. Kite surfers will be dangled in the cage from time to time as an added attraction.

Primary industry officials have defended the approval of the new abattoir opening today at Greenmount saying that local residents had been consulted and it would bring fresh activity to the region. The predicted increase fish life including shark numbers was a valuable bi product of the new mega factory. Locals have welcomed the installation,stating that due to a downturn in tourist numbers in the region, a new attraction would be a boost for the local economy.
Local shark expert Mr Finlay is excited by the opening saying he has ordered 3 new shark cages for tourists to experience the marine life up close.Mr Finlay became a legend several years ago when his yacht sunk off Morton Island after hitting a sunfish.He spent 36 hours in shark infested waters and only survived by confusing sharks that surrounded him by eating his own leg.He said it was a tough decision and in hind sight he may have handled it differently. Dehydration had caused hallucinations and when rescued, the Water Police commented on the pod of dolphins which had been keeping him company. His focus will now shift from aged night time stand-up paddle tours of canals looking for signs of bull sharks to cage diving adventure experiences for the Japanese tourist market. There has been some objection made by a few visiting surfers but their concerns were more about parking spaces being difficult already and were dismissed as short-sighted.
The site proposal was submitted to council in 1952 before the birth of most of the surfers who frequent the area anyway.Locals residents welcomed the new installation saying the surfing ecology was in need of an new man made balance.
Happy 1 April.

Ate his own leg? Is this taking the piss?

And they are going to charge for you to enter the surf?

alfamale said...

Hope your kidding Troy, but it wouldn't suprise me if your not 😳

Don't forget he is a kiter now we have to make allowances. He has even managed to get his missus off a windsurfer and onto a kite. I rest my case