I think the apple do not disturb function totally deal with this... You set it once for the hours you want and no phone squeaks or farts all night every night. And the setting where you can allow favourites or tagged contacts calls to come through is perfect in my view so if a loved one tried to call whatever the time you'll receive it. Good design.
To the OP I think it's the responsibility of the device owner to determine what they feel is acceptable and manage their device appropriately...... Mmmmmm must have that chat with the missus!