My married best friend has been cheating on his wife for a year now.
I did know he was doing this but thought it was only for 3-4 months and last weekend he confessed it has been going on for a year.

At no stage did I condone his actions or agree with them. I have told him my thoughts but I like him for him not his wife/family which is why I have not said anything.
The main problem is I am his excuse to get out of the house as I live an hrs drive away and I cannot even go over anymore as our story's might not match.
+ now knowing it's been a year I am very disgusted as I thought maybee a fling but apparently not.

We used to go out every weekend for our recreational activities but his wife thinks he does but he is shagging some other chick - everytime I say lets go he states "remember we went last 3 weeks in a row" and need to go out with the wife this weekend.

I don't know what to do and I do not want to loose a best friend, which I have known for 13years

Easy - do the right thing!

start tapping his wife?

Then get a steamy four way going..

youngbull said...

My married best friend has been cheating on his wife for a year now.

I don't know what to do and I do not want to loose a best friend, which I have known for 13years

Do you think Seabreeze is an appropriate place to post this kind of thread.

How can you precede the word "best" with the word "a"?

There is only one "best".

Is that the kind of bloke you really want to have as a friend. Seems to me he's been taking everyone for a 'ride' in his relationships.
If you value his friendship maybe you need to set it straight and tell him not to use you in his charades.
Guilty by association would be the verdict.

NoBS said...

start tapping his wife?

Then get a steamy four way going..

Most sensible answer so far. win-win-win-win situation.

Stalk him.
Take photos take video of compromising situations.
Extort your next Mentawi adventure out of him.

youngbull said...

nice girl but she can be nasty, very very nasty.

Well, sounds like soon he's about to find out how nasty her and her lawyer are gonna get...

Well done YB,

It's Always the best policy being straight up with your lovely


Disclaimer
unless you are sneaking new toys into the shed

If he is prepared to cheat on his wife, there is no lower he can go.
A wife should be the be all and end all of all friends, the first the highest.

Your friend is not a friend, he is using you, he is using his wife.
F??? him off

He will dissapear in the future anyway, probably after he tried to shag your missus, sorry mate and good luck.

I wouldn't want your "married best friend" in the trenches beside me. Friendship is mutual and he is using your friendship to pump some broad. I would tell him to fark off until he sorts out if he wants to be Arthur or Martha.

youngbull said...

Made of spiders web stronger and more flexible than steel......

I would not rat him out, unless a dangerous situation might occur to him/her or the children.

It is easy to ditch him - but I stand by my 2 friends whatever choices they make. I know I'm being used atm but his head is not in the right place and people make silly decisions when it comes to emotional thinking - at least he talks to me about it and I do not want him to have to hide it from me. I am very loyal and honust which helps.
I also have not spoken to his wife in 3 months so I have not had to lie to her and I will keep it that way for the time being.

Maybe, just maybe he loves this other woman more than his wife. Like really, honestly, forever and ever yada yada.

What then?

its pretty simple, yet i have learnt the hard way. if somebody can screw someone over(pun half intended), dont think they wont screw you over cause your mates.
these type off people are all about self gratification and self preservation. just be glad its not your wife he is nailing
one question youngbull, how would you feel if you found out that one off your wifes friends knew that your wife was having a affair and hid it from you? goes to the old,treat people the way you want to be treated i guess

He will get found out and when the (nasty) Mrs comes looking for those that knew what was going on you better hope that you can face the music.

Your Mrs is only going to get more annoyed with you the longer that you are part of the deception. Be honest to her, if not yourself, at least.

Move on, it really isn't worth it.

I don't mind any comments about me or him but PLEASE do not refer to my wife being tapped by anyone, yes I know its calling the kettle black... just don't go there...she has no part of this and nor should she.

I have spoken to another friend today who had it happen to him - he also knows all about it, which is a little bit bizarre he does not take a more upfront approach although after our conversation he ripped through this guy and told him straight. I received a call for us to all meet up tom.. Intervention time. We have all been through alot together and supported each other everytime , this recent one is the nastiest though.

Yes he is a lying cheating prick and a bad human being but like I said above I will not ditch him yet. The conversation we have tom will be the decider.

Like someone said he might love the other girl more and we are beginning to feel this is the case. So sad really his wife might be grumpy and snappy alot but she does not deserve this or anyone.

divaldo said...


I seriously don't know why you even put this up on seabreeze dude....

Why not?

It's on the general forum, stuff like this happens, sometimes you get pretty good advice - besides it's good reading.