Don't pay someone when you can do it yourself. You can make up the perfect mixture easily.
Just fill an empty drink bottle with some smug captured from the cloud surrounding commuters who cycle.
Mix in a little of the oil of entitlement, milked from the sweaty foreheads of motorists trying to slip past a rider wobbling all over the lane without being responsible for vehicular manslaughter.
Add a pinch of bile brought up by the sight of men in lycra.
Stir well and apply as neccessary.
(you did ask for it
)
