Just now listening to the radio & with Father's day coming up they're airing some calls from listener's 'father of the year' stories for dads that don't have much of a chance of ever receiving one. It reminded me of one of my own stories, and I'm sure there are other breeze members that probably deserve a nomination;

A few years ago I was at the footy with my kids & a couple of mates. My son was off (somewhere) playing and I was standing on 'Can hill' with my 3yo daughter hanging around my legs asking to "pop-up" (pick her up). I didn't want to put my beer down so I grabbed her by one hand & in one swift motion, lifted her up onto my hip. As I did she started crying...just as this happened the wife turned up, after a bit she decided to take the kids to visit their grandparents. My daughter was still sooking and I told the wife (without taking my eyes off the game) "she'll be right - just tired & sooky".

About an hour later I got a phone call from my wife to let me know that after a trip to the docs, my daughter had a dislocated elbow & torn ligaments and wanted to know how this happened...needless to say - I didn't get lucky that night.

To top it off, after the game we went to the pub & met up with the wives/kids for a meal. Afterwards, us guys & a couple of kids went in to the bar to get a couple of last brews in and as I was enjoying a pint of Kilkenny 4yo son (running around) hit the corner of a table just above his eye...it was a couple of days before his 5th birthday. The wife wasn't real happy with me & with 2 injured kids 'we' decided to call it a night. I'm reminded of my lack of parenting abilities every time someone sees his birthday photo with his eye swollen, shut & blue and his sister next to him with her arm in a sling.

Sailhack said...

Just now listening to the radio & with Father's day coming up they're airing some calls from listener's 'father of the year' stories for dads that don't have much of a chance of ever receiving one. It reminded me of one of my own stories, and I'm sure there are other breeze members that probably deserve a nomination;

A few years ago I was at the footy with my kids & a couple of mates. My son was off (somewhere) playing and I was standing on 'Can hill' with my 3yo daughter hanging around my legs asking to "pop-up" (pick her up). I didn't want to put my beer down so I grabbed her by one hand & in one swift motion, lifted her up onto my hip. As I did she started crying...just as this happened the wife turned up, after a bit she decided to take the kids to visit their grandparents. My daughter was still sooking and I told the wife (without taking my eyes off the game) "she'll be right - just tired & sooky".

About an hour later I got a phone call from my wife to let me know that after a trip to the docs, my daughter had a dislocated elbow & torn ligaments and wanted to know how this happened...needless to say - I didn't get lucky that night.

To top it off, after the game we went to the pub & met up with the wives/kids for a meal. Afterwards, us guys & a couple of kids went in to the bar to get a couple of last brews in and as I was enjoying a pint of Kilkenny 4yo son (running around) hit the corner of a table just above his eye...it was a couple of days before his 5th birthday. The wife wasn't real happy with me & with 2 injured kids 'we' decided to call it a night. I'm reminded of my lack of parenting abilities every time someone sees his birthday photo with his eye swollen, shut & blue and his sister next to him with her arm in a sling.

You could have shortened the story by just saying you're a drunk, neglectful parent.

My 14 year old daughter is pretty sure that I AM the Worst Father ever -- let alone just this year.....

Did pretty much the same as Sailhack. At my oldies place I grabbed my daughters hand/wrist as she was about to take a very large step down a very steep and long staircase. She yelped and wouldnt let me grab her arm etc.
We got home and she was a bit sooky. I had a beers and went to bed. Missus stayed up withe her, oops. Next day we took her to the docs and yep, dislocated elbow. Got her to reach for a lollipop, grabbed her wrist, small click and hey presto, all sorted.

Kiterboy, your a tool. Go away.

you don't have kids do you kiterboy?

I think id get worst father of the year award.

Both kids like to surf with me and apparently for some Breezers that is more dangerous than letting them hang at the mall

jbshack said...

I think id get worst father of the year award.

Both kids like to surf with me and apparently for some Breezers that is more dangerous than letting them hang at the mall

Is in W.A.

Yep, done the elbow too.
But I remember putting the kid in his back seat of the car, close the door, hum, it doesn't close, try again harder... I get it now, it's his hand in the door ! Luckily, no drama...
Also lost him for 30 min. We were with 5 families playing in a park, walked home, each one having some kids with us, started BBq and some games, when we realised he was missing, he had decided to visit another playground on the way, but was found by some other parents... Big groups are not as safe as we think.
But it doesn't mean we are neglectful.

I was ten years old when dad closed the car door on my thumb, squashing it in the gap at the front of the door near the hinges. Ouch. He still feels bad when mum brings it up.

If I wasn't day dreaming at the time and looking at the gap and wondering how much it would hurt if I shoved my nose in there (true story) I wouldn't have forgotten where my hands were and got my thumb squashed instead.

Horrible dad or stupid kid, you be the judge

kiterboy said...

You could have shortened the story by just saying you're a drunk, neglectful parent.

Agree with you on the shortening bit - I do get a bit descriptive sometimes when I'm telling a story. I hope you had a chuckle before judging me, as that's the point of this thread - to have a laugh at ourselves as dads...or a laugh at our own dads - even you must have a funny story to tell hey kiterboy? If not - you must've had a sad upbringing and I'm sorry for you.

Drunk? Not really, I enjoy a beer with mates and that game is the local aussie-rules derby between 2 only teams within the town where I grew up (I used to play for one of the teams so it's still a buzz to watch my old team against the other local team) so I try to get up there every year with the family to catch up with friends & let the kids run amok with theirs.

As for the neglectful bit, that's your opinion - the whole point of the story was to share what I thought was a 'good father' story (re; taking my kids to the footy with me and letting them enjoy the atmosphere). I try to include my kids in everything I do...to be honest, if I wasn't drinking & instead was holding a pie or tofu-burger or whatever, the outcome would've been the same...as for the young fella's black-eye - it might as well have been a Maccas table.

As the saying goes - "the devil is in the details", and going by the thumb colours (by the way - mine are green in case you're colour blind), I'm guessing there are many dads here that know the feeling.

Doctor - I still hose the kids down, but normally after the beach. It's now standard for the kids to jump out of the car - drop towel & bathers and stand on the back lawn whilst I unroll the hose!

kiterboy said...

You could have shortened the story by just saying you're a drunk, neglectful parent.

maybe i'm a bit slow, but can you point out the tongue-in-cheek part?

Much [}:)]

echunda said...

kiterboy said...

stamp said...

kiterboy said...

You could have shortened the story by just saying you're a drunk, neglectful parent.

maybe i'm a bit slow, but can you point out the tongue-in-cheek part?

Well I didn't want to be rude and say it, but since you brought it up...

If you need it explained, you wouldn't understand anyway.

Sorry mate, I'll try and use more smileys in my posts to make it easier for you to know humour is intended.

How am I doing?
Better?

Nope, still a wanker

You forgot to add smileys to your post.

Sailhack said...

kiterboy said...

Well at least you mostly saw that my post was tongue in cheek.

I sort of got that, although I guess part of me wanted to defend my actions too (in case you were serious).

I remember my 14th birthday well - that was when dad said I could;
- Drive the paddock bomb around by myself including 'short' trips to neighbours along the side of the road.
- Use his chainsaw (mainly overhead & up ladders) to keep the tree lines tidy.
- Go shooting by myself with either the side-by-side shotty (never allowed to use his 5-shot semi-auto) or 22 magnum. Although he told me if the cops got me and confiscated the guns he'd flog me!

Minor stuff, minor stuff Ol man let me do all that, cept chain saw, never heard of a chain saw, just a bloody axe.
However, at around 13/14 years, my brother and I found what we thought was something real cooool. a 5 gal size grease tin full of black powder, used for log splitting
Ol man was quick onto it, so we spent, including two of my cousins, 3 weeks of school holidays, fabricating all sorts of devices that included anything to do with black powder explosions. Ol man was qualified powder monkey, so no big safety issue. Bit sh1t we had a fantastic 3 weeks, blowing stumps out of the ground, shooting D cell batteries out of heavy wall pipe at targets and so on.
He still is one cool ol fulla, even at his ripe old age today

I remember being about 8 at a cousins birthday party and getting told off by the old man. I dont know why but i punched him in the balls.

Copped the worst hiding of my life after that. I had to tell the teacher I got hit with a golf ball.

on a camping trip in winter, wifey made the kidswear trackies,socksand shoes round the campfire, and they didnt half winge, till I spilt a boiling billy on my daughters foot
after pouring heaps of cold water on the foot , we removed theclothing, but the top layer of skin came away , so i left the other kids with the freinds I was camping with and started the 100km drive to town. half way there the rain started ,and wifeys car almost got washed off the road.
when we got in mobile range of town i rang wifey( who hadnt gone on the camping trip) and asked her for the number for A&E so i could ring them and let them know we were coming in
then having been to hospital, got the foot dressed, and taken cery tired daughter home to mum, drove back out the 100kms to the camping spot, arriving at 4.00am
the restof us stayed camping for 2 days and arrived home witha car load of smoky wet clothes, having had great fun.
wifey not so impressed, and daughter rather unhappy about missing all the camping