Hmm, maybe you should consider getting into the gym.
Nah, seriously it is just technique, as with pretty much everything in this sport.
First, not sure about your popping technique. Hold a nice edge (good) but don't depower. Vear slightly down wind and unhook and then load your lines, edging hard against your kite. When loaded release and pop.
When you land, land pointing at the kite. You will then be travelling basically the same speed as the kite making it easy to hook back in.
One technique that will probably address both of your issues is to hook back in leaving one hand on the bar and the other to grab the chicken loop. That way if its twisted you can simply straighten it up. That way you can also depower the kite slightly by pushing the bar away from you if you are struggling with this. If you try and pull the entire bar toward you with both hands obviously you are sheeting in to full power.
As to the donkey d**k, I always take mine off but I guess that is personal preference. I don't ride with them ever so it's unnecessary.
