Interpol have been called in to investigate an international syndicate pushing speed in Europe and Australia. Inquiries began after complaints from Australia about doped up Dutchies crossing the border into France where they engaged in speed crazed orgies they secretly videoed. "They are using some contest run out of Australia by the "Shrink" as a cover for their activities", according to a leak from an unnamed Interpol source, "we were tipped off about the lack of drug testing in the competition and suspected it was a front for their activities. We know they are on speed and suspect there is some ecstacy involved but our biggest concern is the evo they are using...we've never heard of it before. Our senior scientist on the hill has been analysing the tracks they have been making, only problem is he can't confirm their exact location but is pretty sure of the speed. They are dopplered up and any time we've tried to follow them they've managed to lose us."

The leader of the group is a well known importer in the Netherlands who has been pushing speed to unsuspecting locals. "Initially we didn't pay much attention as it is legal in Holland and doped up Dutchies are the norm, its when they started crossing into France for clandestine speed runs they drew attention worldwide." Sources in Australia who tipped off Interpol wish to remain anonymous for fear of reprisals but one who did talk to us, Wacky, had this to say, "We dont want them coming down to the pit and taking over, we've got enough trouble with interstate gangs flying in for speed fixes...last thing we need is a bunch of doped up Dutchies maxed out on Evo overtaking the KA boys. It's been a challenge to stay on top."

All sounds pretty vague to me, is there nothing you can be certain of?

Asio have been asked by Interpol to assist with their investigations after reports surfaced evo was smuggled across state lines and showed up at the Pit on Monday. While the Dutch dopers were nowhere to be found at least one nudist was spotted streaking across the water on speed. Fortunately no video was captured of the perpetrator but he was packing lead, luckily not in his pencil, and the public has been warned not to approach.

I confess. I'm addicted. Put me in rehab before it's too late. I've tried and tried to get over the insane buzz but it just keeps biting away until I give in. [}:)][}:)][}:)]